Molly Bears

On February 24, 2012, my life was changed forever. After five days in active labor at the hospital and at only 23 weeks pregnant, I gave birth to our precious little boy, Robby. He lived in my arms for only two hours before going to heaven to be with Jesus. It has been four months and eleven days since that tragic day that we lost our baby boy, and ever since that moment that we had to give Robby back to the nurse at the hospital to send to the funeral home; my arms have ached for my baby.

When you lose a baby you not only have a broken, aching heart, but you also have aching, empty arms. The whole time I was pregnant with Robby my favorite thing to sit around and think about was getting to hold my precious baby boy. I thought about getting to hold him for the first time after he was born and how special it was going to be. I thought about getting to rock him to sleep in my new rocking chair and how I was going to hold him and love on him all the time.  What I didn’t imagine was that my time with Robby was going to be cut so incredibly short and that I would only be able to hold our sweet little boy in my arms for only a few hours.

  

Now I have this constant ache in my arms- it is an ache for my baby. 

A month after we lost Robby one of my good friends in one of my support groups told me about Molly Bears. 

Molly Bears is a non-profit organization that was started by Bridget, who lost her daughter. Her daughter, Molly, was stillborn. Bridget knows exactly what the ache feels like and because of that ache she started Molly Bears. 

Molly Bears are handmade, weighted teddy bears that are designed to weigh exactly what your baby weighed.  My bear will weigh 1 pound 4.4 ounces. What is so special about a weighted teddy bear? Well, I realize that it won’t do anything miraculous like bring Robby back or cure pre-term labor, but it does help mothers, like me, who are grieving the loss of their child. 

This organization runs solely on donations. When you sign up to receive a personalized bear they don’t charge you at all. 

Molly Bears is starting to run out of funds. They have sent out over 1,500 teddy bears since they started 23 months ago, but in order to keep making and sending out bears they need more donations.

What I love about Molly Bears is that you know exactly what your donations are going toward- they are going toward filling a mother’s empty arms and lessening the ache by at least a tiny bit. 

I haven’t received my Robby Bear yet, and it could be a whole year before I do. There are thousands of women like me who are waiting on their bear. I sent a donation and ordered my bear back in March and I can’t wait for the day that I am able to hold my Robby Bear and feel the exact weight once again that my sweet, precious baby boy was. I never imagined I would only get to hold him for a few hours, and each day I think about the time when I did get to hold him and I try to remember how it felt. 

Even though I will never get to hold my Robby again, I believe that the memory of holding him will be sweet as I cuddle my Robby Bear in my arms and remember my angel Robby.

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